Episode 150A – Thieves Stole the Newsdump

Thieves Stole the Newsdump. That’s right, Thieves!. We were shipping the podcast to our non-existent location in England when it was hijacked. If it shows up on eBay let us know so we can track down the thieves.

Fan Email

Sorry no email this week. I blame Trump. If it wasn’t for his unique brand of insanity I’m sure that you wouldn’t be under your bed hiding, but would be in front of your computer enjoying the podcast and emailing to your heart’s content.

Thieves Stole the Newsdump

Lucky you, you get to see the physical forms of the DG Podcast. How about that?

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 150A – Thieves Stole the Newsdump

Episode 149B – Rocketbirds Emerge as Avalon Lords

Rocketbirds Emerge as Avalon Lords. In the highly anticipated sequel to Rocketbirds you must command your chicken army to rise up against the oppressive penguins. Armed with medieval weapons, armor, and tactics you will crush the other upstart lords of Avalon to become high king.

What’s Going On

Rhett has been playing Dark Souls III, as you might have guessed had you been paying attention. He is very close to reaching the end of the game and has slowed down a bit so he doesn’t burn out. So, he also has been playing Battlefleet Gothic: Armada. Jason has played some Destiny which you are probably tired of hearing. He has also been playing Deponia, a great point-and-click, comedy, adventure game. Unfortunately, until the podcast takes off and starts making us money we may be behind the curve on playing new games.

Rocketbirds Emerge as Avalon Lords

However, we are not behind the curve on reviewing* new games that we haven’t played. Jason has put together a list of, according to him, the most notable games coming out this week. He may not like them, but you might.

* – Remember that these reviews are based on the painstaking hour of research that I did this morning and are completely unbiased and fair.

As always you are welcome to look at the faces of the DG Podcast while you listen to us ramble if that is your poison.

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 149B – Rocketbirds Emerge as Avalon Lords

Episode 149A – Stupid Drama Newsdump

Stupid Drama Newsdump. There’s too much stupid drama on the internet today. I should say that drama is always stupid, but the drama is incredibly stupid recently. Seriously, what are you going to do? The internet is a terrible place.

Fan Email

Chance sent us an email. What has he been up to? Deus Ex Invisible War, buying more games for his Xbox, killing it at work, paying too much in shipping, then there’s the whole Chyna and Prince things, and then being ungrateful for the podcast.

Stupid Drama Newsdump

Lucky you, you get to see the physical forms of the DG Podcast. How about that?

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 149A – Stupid Drama Newsdump

Ermagerd Ermerl!

What is up, you two stray hairs on the public toilet seat of life? I hope this week in geek has treated you both well and found you doing things no responsible adult human being should be. I have had a pretty good couple of weeks. I am already close to making my month’s numbers, which I am told almost no new hire ever does, and for a while I was hanging tough with the top salesperson in the district. Not to brag, but selling is just one of those odd things in that while I despise doing it, I have a weird knack for it. I am sure Rhett has done little else besides play Dark Souls this week. The fascination with that needlessly difficult series is lost on me. I actually have gotten in some gaming this week as well.­­­­ Like the esteemed Mr. Peterson, I’ve been stuck on one game for the most part. I am still plodding my way through Deus Ex Invisible War on my trusty old original Xbox. I do not know what it is about that series in general, but since I beat the original on pc, I just cannot get enough of it. I have added a crap ton of games to my retro stash as well. I pulled a Rhett and won an auction on Goodwill’s website. I paid $11 for a bundle of 12 original Xbox games, then turned around and got hosed with shipping charges that were higher than the winning bid!! I knew that would be the case, but two of the games alone in that stack have a retail value of $40 combined, so I am getting my money’s worth out of the deal. My danged Xbox library will have grown from 80 some odd a couple of weeks ago to just shy of 150 by the end of next week. Oh, and I have also been wrestling with a terrible sinus infection for the past two days. I have been blowing my nose and picking it more than Rhett does on the show, and he is a human booger extractor of the highest order once he’s on camera.

I also wheeled and dealed for a game, Panzer Dragoon Orta, with a guy out in Sacramento. Turns out he is a super nice guy with a really good Youtube channel about retro gaming. I think you would like the fellow. He seems really personable and he knows his gaming. His show is called Escape to Gaming. It’s worth checking out if y’all get the time and are bored enough to do so.

So I suppose by now y’all heard about the death of Prince. I mean, Chyna from the WWE died too, but she made the mistake of checking out at the same time as a cultural and musical icon, so her passing takes a backseat to his. Sorry, Chyna, but you just never contributed to the public consciousness in the same way Prince did. I know Rhetty Poo was not a fan, but I loved the dude’s music. He was a brilliant songwriter, and a rare talent. I feel like a part of my youth died with him.

I was listening to part B on the way home from work, and it struck me that y’all must have been plotting a way to make my eyes glass over in a way they never have. First y’all dished on anime, which we have established sucks in general, then you moved right along to the fantasy book stuff. You were killing me, Smalls. You were killing me. Then you went into a discussion about Dark Souls…man. I still love you guys, but I had to do a lot of skipping around to dodge those parts. Why, it’s almost as if I am not the deciding factor when you’re determining the show’s content or something. Geez.

Anywho, I’m going to cut this short for now. Baby girl is waking up, so I guess I am obligated to do the daddy thing. Take it easy!

Episode 148B – Gears of Megamagic

Gears of Megamagic. Aliens have come from underground to terrorize mankind. So, you must don your COG armor, pick up your deadly Lancer, and learn devastating spells from the five schools of magic to defeat these vicious foes. Or it could be an ice fishing simulator set in a world based on Norse mythology and you must stop the apocalypse by catching the destroying wyrm.

What’s Going On

Rhett has been playing so much Dark Souls III he basically hasn’t done anything else. He’s played so much that he’s forgotten about sleep and barely remembers about eating. Jason has watched the first two episodes of the Shannara Chronicles by MTV and is sorely disappointed. The only thing that he really liked about the show was the visuals, the scenery, the costumes, and the location shots. Everything else was garbage. He also watched a YouTube video discussing the argument of whether or not Rey from the Force Awakens is a Mary Sue, spoiler she is. There was probably more going on, but I missed it.

Gears of Megamagic

Episode 148A – A Strange Blizzard Newsdump

A Strange Blizzard Newsdump. It has been a strange time for Blizzard this week. There’s just something that the internet needs to get into its thick head. Don’t mess with companies by using DDOS, it doesn’t work. Express your displeasure with your money. It will work every time.

Fan Email

Chance has once again surfaced as our superfan. He could easily be dethroned as soon as we get an email from someone else. This week he rags on Charlie Brown (It’s like watching someone kick a kitten), played Deus Ex Invisible War, collecting more games, watching No Man’s Sky video, buying a Playstation TV, and more stuff about Alison Rapp.

A Strange Blizzard Newsdump

Once again the DG podcasters dare to show their faces after what they have tried to perpetrate on the unsuspecting internet public.

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 148A – A Strange Blizzard Newsdump

Email

Buenos enchiladas, you two! I hope this week in geek has been kind to you. I have not gotten to listen to the last couple of episodes all the way through, but I did catch the pertinent parts, I believe. That said, I have something to get off of my chest. I freaking cannot understand how anyone LIKES Charlie Brown. I mean, the Christmas special is all cute and everything, but the popularity of the series itself was always lost on me. It is not funny at all, and there is nothing particularly compelling about the characters. All in all, the whole thing is as vanilla/saltine crackers/Ned Flanders as it can be. It is sickeningly wholesome and dull! Since you felt the need to discuss it, though, I thought I would chime in on the whole Marcy and Peppermint Patty’s secret love for Charlie. I call shenanigans. Those two are clearly lesbians who have an unrequited, sticky faced infatuation with each other. Charlie is a serial killer in the making, Lucy is destined to be a four times divorced alcoholic hag who abuses her children, Schroeder will grow up to be a self important douchenozzle, and Sally will, after many poor life decisions, end up with a career in porn and die at 33 from a heroin overdose. But that’s just my theory.

Moving on, I have actually gotten in some quality gaming time lately. Charlotte has changed her sleeping habits a bit and now takes long naps on my days off, which has allowed me to spend some solid hours with Deus Ex Invisible War on the original Xbox. It is the one I never have beaten, and though the graphics are understandably dated, it is a tremendous amount of fun. Ammo is in short supply in the game, and there is not an option to use your fists, so you have to be very judicious in your use of guns. I do not know why, but my retro collecting habit has become almost laser focused on building my original Xbox library. I’ve gone from 83 titles to closing in on 120 in just a couple of weeks. It doesn’t help matters that I work down the hill from a gaming store that has a permanent buy two get one free policy on used games under $8. Someone online asked me if I planned to collect the entire library of Xbox games. Ummmm…no. I never have understood completionists in retro collecting. Every system ever made has too many garbage titles not worth owning for that to be of any interest to me.

I also got to watch IGN’s 21 minute long video of in game action from No Man’s Sky. Every new bit of info I hear about that game makes me even more eager to own it. I may actually break my rule about never preordering games for this one, guys. They had one of the developers playing the game, and he was explaining just how procedurally generated the game actually is. He claimed that the universe in the game is so vast, with literally every visible star being open for exploration, that 99% of the locations in the game will never be visited. That is mind boggling. He also said that the game will heavily rely on mining and resource acquisition, which will require exploration. That speaks to me on so many levels. By its very design it sounds like a single player gamer’s dream come true! It promises to be THE game for the antisocial sort.

I do not recall if I mentioned it, but even though they’ve discontinued making the device for the North American market, I purchased a Playstation TV console. Wal-Mart had them marked down to $20, which is a decent deal on it, even if all I ever use it for is streaming. Theoretically it can play Vita games on my tv, but honestly aside from hooking it up, I have yet to actually play with it any. Also, it’s a cheap way to add my PS4 to another tv.

So did you hear that Alison Rapp, the former Nintendo spokesperson whose firing set off a major crapstorm on the internet, turned out to be a high priced hooker in Seattle? It seems she was going by the name Maria Mint, and she was letting every other Mario jump all over her Yoshi for a few coins. I just find it hilarious that all of the feminazis came out in full force to denounce her being let go from Nintendo, and then have their complaints utterly gutted by her side job. After seeing what she looks like, I have a hard time imaging how any dude would sleep with her for free, let alone pay for it. Oh well…to each their own I suppose.

Well guys, I guess I need to cut this short, so I’m gonna do that and go shower. Take it easy and have a great show, fellas.

Episode 147B – Dark Souls Stories

Dark Souls Stories. The world is about to end and the only person who can stop it is the undead hero, the Ashen One. He woos the princess and recruits an anthropomorphic bunny as a sidekick. I could be wrong about that last part.

What’s Going On

He’s been watching 11-22-63 with James Franco and written by Stephen King, Total War: Attila, Quantum Break while waiting for Dark Souls III to be released later this week, and watching Swiss Army Man. Jason has almost finished Jessica Jones. He tried to finish it before the podcast, but still finds time to bash the show. There are some good things about the show, but they can’t overshadow the problems with the show.

Dark Souls Stories

Jason has once again dredged the depth of the internet to find scrum amid the cream*. We don’t know how he manages to do it every week, but we suspect he uses Google.

* – You should know that cream rises to the top so Jason had to dig deep to find things like Soda Drinker Pro. The world just can’t have too many simulators.

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 147B – Dark Souls Stories

Episode 147A – Suicide Squad Reshoots the Newsdump

Suicide Squad Reshoots the Newsdump. One time just wasn’t enough, they had to reshoot the newsdump. I guess they just wanted to make sure it was dead. Although the Suicide Squad isn’t know for half measures. They are always over the top or nothing at all. Seriously, don’t mess with these people unless you are Batman, you are just asking for trouble otherwise.

Fan Email

Again our superfan has disappointed us. He could have shot off a quick insult, but I have to say that while his is our superfan, but he’s also lazy. Not that we aren’t, we are incredibly lazy, just think about the delay on this posting. I should have had this posted at least a week ago, but here we are and I just barely got it posted. I’m not going to make any promises about more timely releases though. It’s not like you would believe them anyway.

Suicide Squad Reshoots the Newsdump

There are several good stories in the newsdump this week. No, there really are. I’m not just saying that to get you to listen to the podcast.

Rhett and Jason finally put in an appearance. It’s about time don’t you think to be able to put faces to this travesty that is the DG Podcast.:

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 147A – Suicide Squad Reshoots the Newsdump

Episode 146B – Dead Star Quantum

Dead Star Quantum. A game set in a solar system with a dying star that affects the way time works, sounds good. That isn’t what this podcast is about, but it is close.

What’s Going On

Unfortunately I got behind doing these postings and I can’t remember what happened this morning let alone two weeks ago. We probably did something fun or funny or lame. I know that isn’t much, but you get the drift. If it was something unusual I would remember.

Dead Star Quantum

The pre-reviews are in. We are going to give you our unsolicited opinion on the games coming out this week*.

* – This week I put up a dartboard and threw darts until I got the review that I liked.

Let us know what you think about the topics discussed tonight by commenting on our Twitter account, comment here on blog, or go to the forum. You can also email us at
thedistractedgamers@gmail.com and support us on Patreon.

The Distracted Gamers Podcast Episode 146B – Dead Star Quantum